Seek Him.

"Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord."

~ Philippians 3:8a~

I don't know if it shows, but I usually write for this blog during the times when I am feeling the most broken.  That's why the posts usually contain so much hope- I need that hope to sustain me so that I can carry on and be okay.  So that I can grow in my walk with Christ instead of being knocked down by Satan's arrows. Oftentimes, writing a post about what God has been teaching me and finding Scripture that supports my train of thought is enough to last me a few days.  I write these posts for myself more than anyone else, to remind myself of truth when I am in doubt.  And it works.  But this week, God told me that wasn't enough.  I need to know Him more.

It's no secret that this year has been rough for me.  I've only told a couple of people the details of why, and honestly, the reasons aren't all that important.  People go through much worse every day.  Even so, hurt is hurt, and what's more important is the outcome of the trials I have been going through.

Though it was far from the most upsetting of the trials of this year, school was really stressful this semester and the anxiety it brought on caused my vision to be clouded.  Now that the semester has come to an end, though, I can look back over the last several months with amazement at what God has done for me.  Here are some highlights:

In the midst of my seemingly constant studying for classes, and rigorous preparation for my audition into the music program at Georgia College & State University, God opened the door for me to play in the band at the church that I had been attending for only two weeks.  Since then, I have gotten to play and worship with those crazy-talented musicians several times and I am amazed and so thankful that God put such a blessed opportunity in my life.

I have found wonderful new friends at that church and have connected with a small group that encourages me to grow in Christ. In addition to my new friends, several of the friendships that I already had have strengthened into deeper, more encouraging relationships.

I was accepted into the music education program at Georgia College & State University and offered a $1,000 scholarship for the year. (Hooray!)

More than anything, though, I've learned a lot about the character of God this year.  In order to have a growing relationship with someone, it is necessary to continuously learn more about who they are.  When that relationship is with an infinite God, learning who He is is the most amazing thing possible.  As I grow and change, He remains the same, and I gain new capacity to grasp more of Him.  But I can't fill this capacity just through being thankful for His blessings and aware of His guidance.  It must go deeper than that.  Which is what I've been leading up to...

I cannot stress how important, how vital it is to communicate with God through prayer and studying the Word.  It is possible to go through life without these things.  It's even possible to be happy without these things.  But it is not possible to have true joy or a growing relationship with the Lord, to experience His absolute best for your life, without praying to Him and reading His Word, which is alive.

I consistently come up short in my end of my relationship with God.  I get distracted.  I foolishly believe that it's okay to hold the gifts that He has given me closer than God Himself.  I get lazy.  I coast by.
That's not enough.  

God does not hide Himself from us.  Instead, He reaches through the distance we put between ourselves and Him, and shows His power everywhere.  We have the amazing ability to speak to Him through prayer.  In this country, we have the freedom to carry His Word around in our back pocket and read it as we please.  It is so important to be in the Word.  I wish I could explain the power that is within it, but I cannot.

There is nothing better.  Everything apart from God is meaningless.  Getting to know God through His Word is so powerful and beautiful.  I have never experienced such Love or Power as this... but don't just trust me on that.  You have to experience it for yourself.

"For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires."

~Hebrews 4:12~

"All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work."

~2 Timothy 3:16-17~

"Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.  Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done.  Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.  His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live with Christ Jesus."

~Philippians 4:6-7~