Yeah, I'm that girl. The one who grew up in church and asked Jesus to live in her heart at the ripe age of four years old. I've had my fights with doubt, impatience, temptation, and obedience just like anyone else. But one thing I never struggled with was God's love. Even when my faith in God would waver, I knew one thing- if there was a God, whoever He was loved me very much. Blessed assurance- I've always had it.
It took me nineteen years to realize that God loves me in so many ways that He truly can fill every longing in my heart. All this time, I've been calling Him "Master," "Savior," "Father," "King." I am so very thankful that He is all of these things. But do you see a common theme? All of these names carry the connotation of power over a helpless individual. He is indeed all-powerful, and I am indeed helpless outside of His strength. I realized today, though, that I have been so wrapped up in how unworthy I am of His love and mercy that I have been unwilling to truly accept His passionate love. I accepted only the love of a good Master to a slave, a glorious Savior to a trapped victim, a kind Father to a child, a merciful King to a peasant. Those are great loves. They've kept me in awe and will continue to do so forever. God is the Author of every love, though, and He has even more to offer than what I had realized before.
"When that day comes," says the Lord, "you will call me 'my husband' instead of 'my master.'"
-Hosea 2:16 (NLT)
This is the Lord's promise to unfaithful Israel. This is a promise that the Lord, in all His beautiful glory, made because He is Love itself.
It has never occurred to me that God could fill even that place in my heart that longs desperately for the love of a husband to a wife. It was only by divine revelation that I realized the beautiful truth that as I mature, my God is able, and wants, to fill every desperate longing of this young woman's heart. The Lord is completely, passionately, irrevocably in love with those who accept His grace and fall into His merciful arms.
I am so unworthy. I fall short of His glory by my very nature. But I am learning now to accept the ardent and unfailing love that He has to offer now that He has washed me clean of my sins.
"For the mountains may move and the hills disappear, but even then my faithful love for you will remain. My covenant of blessing will never be broken," says the Lord, who has mercy on you.
~Isaiah 54:10~
